Or, we can all summarize our views for the benefit of the thread.
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Tesla announced the P85D with having a lot more power than the previous performance model (the P85+).
The high speed validation work was not done so the cars were shipped without improved higher speed (over say 40 mph or so) performance.
Tesla announces a free OTA upgrade to improve the P85D's high speed performance (perhaps to bring the cars higher speed performance more in line with their own expectations for the car at launch).
Turned out hardware was needed to pull off the higher speed performance and thus the upgrade and Ludicrous was born.
I'm reasonably sure Tesla did not plan on having three levels of performance when they launched the P85D. Their previous MO was small battery, base and performance. Ludicrous was only added to pay for the hardware necessary to draw more current (making lemon aid out of lemons) not because they wanted to add yet another tier of performance.
Anyone else want to provide a summary that accurately reflects their view. For the record, the above is simply my current opinion and is not meant to summarize anyone else's.
Sure, I'll go over my summary of what I think happened at Tesla.
"We need to get Q4 numbers up. Ideas?"
"Well, we have the P85D coming out. That should help if we can get it done in time."
"Yeah, but that's not going to be enough to hit our targets. We'll have to rush it. People are happy enough with their cars as it is. We need something that will appeal to existing owners as well as new owners enough to make them upgrade."
"Well we could throw in an engineering demo of autosteer and talk about it in present tense the whole time without actually saying it's not going to be available for a year."
"Good good. That's on the list. What else?"
"Well, we could make the gap between the P85 and the P85D look better by changing a bunch of metrics. It's only 46 HP more, but it has two motors and has a bunch more torque. That counts for something right?"
"Yeah, we'll just use that 1-ft rollout thing that some other companies use on the 0-60 time to make it look like a wider gap too."
"We'll just add up the power of the two motors and advertise that, even though we know the car can't actually put out that much power, no one will notice because of all of that torque."
"Won't people eventually notice, like people who upgrade from a P85 and notice highway passing performance isn't any better?"
"Yeah well, we'll just put out an OTA update to unlock more power after we test more to make sure things don't blow up, and advertise that so people don't complain. If that doesn't work maybe we'll come up with something else."
"Well, we don't have EPA range numbers for the P85D yet either. We could put some ideal numbers on the order page, that we might be able to get in some engineering firmware, in the meantime along side the other models' EPA numbers. That should make it look even better."
"OK, so we're just going to greatly exaggerate the improvements of the P85D vs the P85 and do our best to appeal to that market. Sounds like a plan!"
(3 weeks later at the D launch event)
"We were able to improve almost everything about the car." "The acceleration gets a little faster, the top speed is higher, the range/efficiency actually increases."
"In the P85D we've actually retained the larger rear motor and added the medium sized motor to the front which basically gives the car half a gain as much power."
"The P85 is pretty good on the power front, as probably a bunch of you have those cars. But this car is nuts. It's like taking off from a carrier deck. It's just bananas. Like having your own personal roller coaster."
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The majority of people are pointing out that Tesla's method of reaching this number, while misleading, has some technical basis in reality and can be backed up. You disagree with that and that's fine. To accuse people of lying and trying to confuse the situation by giving out misinformation is a little much. That would be similar to others accusing some of taking this situation and trying to get free stuff from Tesla. I don't think anyone is saying the car outputs 691 hp at the shaft if that's the confusion you think people are trying to create. I was promised lighted visors and onboard music storage but haven't made it my life's mission to 'make it right'. I've moved on.
If onboard music storage and lighted visors were something advertised when you bought your car then you've been cheated if you haven't received them. To each their own on how to handle that. I think a fib that mis-advertises 200+ HP in gains resulting in people spending 5 figures+ to upgrade to only get 20% of those gains is a bit more of a blunder than $50 in parts/software for the things you mentioned.
And you're lying to yourself if you can honestly say that no one posting here is trying to obfuscate or lie about the issue. There are posts not too far up that are flat out wrong from a technical standpoint. There are others that flat out say "the car has 691 HP." Sorry, these things are wrong. It's misinformation, misleading, and does nothing to remedy the situation.