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Help! Windshield wiper problems

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Since delivery, I've had problems with my wipers squeaking loudly (when they reverse directions at the top and bottom of each wipe), as well as loudly chattering, skipping and thumping across the windshield.

Video demonstrating the problem (volume up)

The only (temporary) solution I've found is to squirt washer fluid. This solution lasts several wipes only (30-60 seconds smooth operation).

It's super distracting when driving in wet weather, as I'm constantly monitoring the wipers to ensure they're operating smoothly, and squirting washer fluid as needed (I go through many litres).

Neither the original nor replacement windshield was ever treated or coated with anything. Only regular glass cleaner was ever used.

Attempted fixes:
  • OEM wiper blades replaced 3x
  • Wiper arms adjusted 1x, replaced 1x
  • Wiper motor/linkage replaced 1×
  • Windshield replaced 1x
Even with the brand new windshield (just got back from service centre), the problem persists.

For some reason the (replacement and original) windshield feels super "grippy" - I can't even wipe it with a dry microfibre towel (inside or outside) Video unlike the side (door) windows, which feel very smooth.

Any advice to achieve quiet/smooth wiper operation?
 
Neither the original nor replacement windshield was ever treated or coated with anything. Only regular glass cleaner was ever used.
For one thing, you don't use regular glass cleaner on the windshield, you use windshield wiper fluid.

Secondly, give it a coating of wax to smooth it over. And this is why you don't use regular window cleaner, they'll remove the wax and strip out many protective coatings (most home surfaces you use the glass cleaner on, don't need/use those types of coatings).
 
Do not handle windshield washer fluid if it contains methanol as an antifreeze. Methanol is toxic and is absorbed through the skin.

Your windshield wiper squeak may be caused by contaminants on the windshield from manufacturing or other source. Try using a clay bar to remove any contaminants. You can ask an auto detailer to perform the clay bar cleaning.
 
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Try Invisible Glass (spray bottle, not aerosol spray). Invisible Glass is an alcohol based window cleaner that does not leave streaks on glass the way some other glass cleaning products leave streaks. Works best if you clean the glass twice. First pass using paper towel and Invisible Glass or another glass cleaner to remove the dirt. Second pass using a microfiber wash cloth and Invisible Glass. (Microfiber stays clean longer, leaves no streaks.) Don't forget to clean the side repeater camera lens covers and the rear camera. You can also use Invisible Glass to clean the side view mirrors.

Don't forget to clean the wiper blades using a paper towel and Invisible Glass or another cleaner. (LPT: when the Tesla Model Y wiper blades are in Wiper Blade Service (bottom right side of the Service Settings menu) mode you can move the closest blade arm up and the other blade arm will move too so you can clean under the blade and clean the full length of the wiper blade. When you exit Wiper Blade Service mode the wiper blade arms will automatically lower to the correct resting position.)

Use Invisible Glass and a microfiber wash cloth for cleaning the interior glass. (LPT: Invisible Glass sells a wand on Amazon to make it easier to reach all parts of the windshield and rear hatch glass.)
 
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My replacement windshield ( installed by Tesla ) had some sort of coating on it that caused this problem and took forever to come off. I have also found that spray on ceramic waxes are great for the paint but also cause this and that paper towels have wetting agents that leave streaks. Invisible Glass is great stuff.
 
There is some kind of very persistent film or goop on Tesla windshields but it can be polished off. I used a glass polish (Ceriglass) and a hand polishing pad designed for glass. After that, I throughly cleaned the window using Carpro Clarify and polished with newspaper (no lint or fuzz). Clarify & newspaper is also my regular cleaner, works great. No wiper chatter and you almost never even need to use the wipers as water beads and rolls off.

Prior to that, I used to use RainX, with good results. You really need to read and follow RainX instructions (apply, let it haze over, sprinkle a few drops of water on it and then polish it off). If you just apply RainX without letting it glaze & polishing it off, it is very sticky and prone to fogging over.
 
I wasn't able to see your video, but we just had a Tesla ranger come and look at our wipers after a couple of months of squeaking on the driver side. We've been through new blades, cleaning windshield, cleaning blades, but nothing worked. The tech took a couple of looks, listened from different locations then pulled the service apron under the hood and noted incorrectly routed driver side windshield washer tubing. He removed washer hose from connector, then removed the driver side wiper arm, removed and reinstalled tubing, then put it all back together. I noted that he did not use wiper service mode, except to reposition the wiper spindle back to the parked position prior to reinstalling the arm. All covered under warranty.