Based on some reading from the past few days, I've clarified (at least a little bit) the process of importing the car from Tilburg to another EU country. It's possible Tesla sends this information once you order but there's nothing written on the order page. It's possible they also take care of some of the steps (e.g. get you transit license plates - steps 3-5).
1. Order car
2. Pay the invoice WITHOUT VAT (nett price)
- it's certainly without VAT for companies
- it's not 100% sure for private individuals. According to EU rules, you need to pay the tax in the country where the vehicle will be registered (see [1]) and Tesla.com [4] states they don't charge VAT, you just need to provide proof of paid VAT. But according to [1] they actually could (and you'd get a refund) and there's also some threads where Tesla simply charged NL VAT (see [5])
3. In order to export a car, you need transit license plates (see [3] for a lot of details - for each country), which you get at RDW in NL (see [2])
4. According to RDW.NL, there's a process to getting transit license plates, which requires you bringing the car there. For this you first need the one-day license plates, which you can order when calling for an appointment.
5. The transit plates are valid for 14 days
6. Once you bring the car to your country, you need to go to your local RDW equivalent and fill out an import declaration. They'll classify the car (CO2 emissions, ...)
7. With that, you can calculate any needed taxes on top of the nett price (e.g. motor vehicles tax)
8. Tesla nett price + other taxes = basis for VAT calculation
9. Pay VAT
10. Register the car locally
I'm pretty sure that's about it but it'd be great if someone who went through this process could chime-in and provide corrections or additions. The thing I'm not 100% sure yet is about insurance - you definitely need it (although according to [3] RDW NL doesn't require it to issue transit plates but I'm not certain where to get it: get temporary insurance in NL? or get regular insurance in advance @home.
For Tesla: providing transit plates and bringing the car to the nearest store (avoiding a long trip to NL in case anything goes wrong) would be a BIG help.
Sources:
[1] Official EC VAT page:
VAT on cars bought abroad (click: BUYING - EU country - NEW car)
[2] Transit license plate for NL:
Transit | RDW
[3] Buying a car in other EU countries (complete guide):
http://epc.si/media/JOINT-PROJECT_AUTO_REPORT_europe.pdf
[4] Tesla Models S order page:
Tesla
[5] Thread from Tesla forum regarding exporting to a NON-EU country:
Export out of EU - Charged 21% Dutch VAT, against the Law? | Tesla