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So a dude walks into Lowes, and comes out green

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S4WRXTTCS

Well-Known Member
May 3, 2015
6,892
8,503
Snohomish, WA
In an effort to remain complaint with HOA regulations I dragged myself to Lowes to get plants.

Plants aren't very exciting, but I don't want to get fined so I do the bare minimum to stay under the radar.

Do they know how much more exciting it is to spend a holiday riding an Electric Longboard, or biking for miles on end with an electric assist Mountain Bike? Do they know a whole world exist outside the ticky tack houses that all look the same?

They being whoever is behind this governing body. I would know who if I paid any attention to it. I just know who to send the money to so I don't get fined.

This weekend was supposed to be the supercharger weekend, but apparently Tesla had better things to do with my car then deliver it to me.

I looked longly at my HPWC as I put my shoes on and said to it "Maybe in another couple weeks my new buddy, just maybe"

Lowe's was the competitive battle ground I've always known it to be. Some weird place aliens must visit to observe humans in their natural habitat. Kids running around, couples yelling at their kids to slow down. Everyone jockeying for position and trying not to get run over. There is an electricity to this place, but it's on a different frequency than me. It's for some parallel me that lived life differently.

I just needed a plunger, and some plants. Any plant would do, but the plunger had to be just right. It's not every day you need a plunger. Apparently either I'm eating more food, or my digestive system is different but I had never needed a plunger before. Eat more Fiber? Eat Less Cheese? Nah.. don't be silly. Buy a better toilet.

Yes, a MAN SIZED toilet!! For man sized ummm….

But, then I saw a glimmer of light.

It's couldn't be could it?

Nah, they don't sell those at Lowe's. They couldn't possibly.

But, yes there it was.

No, not the Red Ryder beebee gun.

But, a Smart Toilet with Bidet.

Adjustable Water Temperature
Adjustable Water Pressure
Warm Air Dryer
Heated Seat

Yes, TAKE MY MONEY.

Oh, wait.. Ugh. it's expensive.

$1267!!!

I pause for a few minutes as my brain works out an excuse to bridge the gap between my unconscious decision of getting it with the conscious part of my brain that needs some kind of justifiable excuse.

In .02 seconds my brain came up with it.

Since Tesla was so late in delivery why not spend what would have been the first months payment on this ridiculous toilet? Sounds good to me.

See you later toilet paper.

Good riddance.

So I think I came out a little more green than I was when I walked in, and it wasn't the plants.

The plants were red, yellow and orange.
 
okay.... just how? Where does the water and air come from that it is clean? How does water not splash everywhere and make a mess? How do you AIM this water? Do you just get your hands down there and go to town (without soap)? It all sounds less hygenic! And marginally more eco at best (water use, and I would use like 10 gallons washing dirty hands). How are your hands not wet for the walk to the sink?
 
The Smart Toilet I got combines a normal toilet with a Bidet Lid.

One pipe brings the water in via the wall (like a normal toilet) and this goes to both the Toilet and the Bidet Lid. The Bidet Lid itself has a holding tank that's used to heat the water to 86F (eco mode). The only other connection is the Power connection (AC power cable).

In terms of appearance it simply looks like a toilet. There is nothing all that different to it other then two buttons on the side. The only obvious thing is the remote sitting next to it, and the seat sensor sticker. The seat sensor keeps you from unintentionally activating it while you're not seated down.

To use the Smart Toilet you simply do your business like a normal toilet, and then flush. Actually you're not really supposed to flush yet, but I do. Sure it's wasting water, but it's not like I go number two everyday let alone multiple times a day.

After you get done flushing (or not flushing) you hit the cleansing button. When you hit this button a nozzle moves directly under your anus, and shoots water up. You can adjust the velocity of this water. It also can oscillate back and forth, and pulses if you want some massage effect. It does this for about a minute, and it's highly controlled and water doesn't go everywhere. You can adjust the position of this nozzle (with the remote) as well depending on your needs.

When you're done with that you use the dry function. This is timed for about 3 minutes, and you can adjust the strength of the air drying.

In addition to the cleansing function It has a "feminine wash" functions as well along with it's own head.

All in all I think it's great. Sure it takes some getting used to, but it does a better job cleaning than toilet paper especially when faced with a really bad "digestive" day.

If averaged over a month I do believe it will actually use less water than my old toilet. It will because it took repeated flushings to flush the ridiculous amounts of toilet paper I used on bad days.

I've tried all kinds of things trying to figure out how to poop like I was 20 again. I tried eating fiber, and improving my diet. That helped a little. I tried siting differently, and I tried Squatting. Neither of those did much of anything.

So I gave up and got a fancy toilet.
 
wiping is faster, thus, more efficient.

Wiping is only more efficient on good digestive days.

I don't want to get into what a good digestive day is versus a bad day. Let's just say a bad day is mexican food day. On a good day I don't even use the bidet function. I just use a little TP, and it's quick and easy.

But, I didn't get the thing for good days. I got the thing for bad days.

For bad days TP is horribly inefficient.

This is when the bidet function saves the day. It does it's thing and leaves me nice and clean. The only debate is whether to wait 3 minutes to allow it to dry me, or to use a bit of TP to dry and I'm good to go.

So now I've reduced my Gas usage with the Tesla, and my TP usage with the Fancy toilet.

What's next?

Hopefully Solar.
 
This thread going nowhere very fast, just circling round 'n round the bowl....means I have no compunctions about hijacking it.

So when I was in the hospital in Fairbanks last week, the whole city was in stitches about how a beaver had wandered into its Lowe's. Caught on video cam was not just the toothy engineer, but employees asking if they could help it find anything, was it looking for some construction material, was it lost? All in all a great place for a young beaver, just evicted from its family home as is beavers' wont, to look for what's needed to start a new beaver lodge.

A beaver walks into an Alaska hardware store ... - Fairbanks Daily News-Miner: Local News
 
So now I've reduced my Gas usage with the Tesla, and my TP usage with the Fancy toilet.

I also took the plunge... so to speak.

A bidet is actually many times more eco-friendly than TP - just based on reduced water & energy used compared to paper manufacturing, never mind bleach, transportation etc. A single roll of toilet paper takes 37 gallons of water to make. A single bidet use amounts to 1/8th of a gallon of water.

And you feel a LOT cleaner afterwards - more so than I expected. Sure it takes a couple of minutes longer, but that's what Smartphones are for. And since it's remote operated, your hands stay completely clean - you probably don't even need to wash them afterwards, though I still do.


So this is one of those rare things that makes environmentally sense, but is overall just a better product, and cheaper in the long run. How many other things in the world can say that...


Now if only Tesla can integrate this into the Model S - I wouldn't be surprised if there haven't been a few passengers being exposed to 'insane' mode that could have used the feature :).
 
I also took the plunge... so to speak.

A bidet is actually many times more eco-friendly than TP - just based on reduced water & energy used compared to paper manufacturing, never mind bleach, transportation etc. A single roll of toilet paper takes 37 gallons of water to make. A single bidet use amounts to 1/8th of a gallon of water.

And you feel a LOT cleaner afterwards - more so than I expected. Sure it takes a couple of minutes longer, but that's what Smartphones are for. And since it's remote operated, your hands stay completely clean - you probably don't even need to wash them afterwards, though I still do.


So this is one of those rare things that makes environmentally sense, but is overall just a better product, and cheaper in the long run. How many other things in the world can say that...


Now if only Tesla can integrate this into the Model S - I wouldn't be surprised if there haven't been a few passengers being exposed to 'insane' mode that could have used the feature :).

I'm not going to question the merits of a bidet or not a bidet, but not only is the logic behind the friendliness silly - but that it was re-reported in Scientific American is scary. Jeb Piel is rolling over in his grave - I had no idea SA had sunk to such standards.

* How many rolls of toilet paper do you consume per sitting? How much water does it take to produce the 60 lbs +/- of porcelain? Of the bidet's metal fixtures? The larger size of the bathroom - and house - to accommodate the bidet? How many people don't also use tp after a bidet? What about the energy associated with the warm water in a bidet? And so on.
 
I'm not going to question the merits of a bidet or not a bidet, but not only is the logic behind the friendliness silly - but that it was re-reported in Scientific American is scary. Jeb Piel is rolling over in his grave - I had no idea SA had sunk to such standards.

* How many rolls of toilet paper do you consume per sitting? How much water does it take to produce the 60 lbs +/- of porcelain? Of the bidet's metal fixtures? The larger size of the bathroom - and house - to accommodate the bidet? How many people don't also use tp after a bidet? What about the energy associated with the warm water in a bidet? And so on.

Modern day bidets are integrated robotic contraptions that are just part of the seat cover. Here is a SFW video of how it works.

No extra space needed in the bathroom or house. It's not much more material needed than to manufacture a traditional toilet seat cover.

And the hot water is heated on demand, just like a tankless hot water heater. It is literally the difference in water & energy consumption of taking a 3 second longer shower (at 2.5gpm, which is standard).


EDIT: Put another way - the average worldwide TP consumption per person is 100 roles/year, so for family of 2, it's 200 roles. Let's say it reduces it by 75% then you get 150 roles reduced per bidet per year. So over a 10-year life (it's probably longer) it's 1500 roles.

That 1500 roles saved would have taken 55'500 gallons of water to make, 1950 kWh of electricity, and 2250 lbs of wood (or recycled paper pulp).

The bidet, used twice per day per person, over 10 years would have used 1825 gallons of water, with 130 kWh of electricity used. So all the remainder (53675 gallons of water, 1820 kWh of electricity, 2250 lbs of wood) can go towards seat production. I would be shocked if you need even 10% of that in equivalence material & energy.
 
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