I agree, no real commercials needed at this point. But fake commercials, sure!
Funny or Die Video Transcript
"Electric Vehicles" by Tesla Signature Owner SOP
[In the vein of a cheesy promo (1m45s)]
Cast:
Suburban housewife: Felicia Day
Policeman (in Jerk mode): Wil Wheaton
Guy on Side of the Road: Nathan Fillion
Set:
Suburban house, driveway
Tesla Model S Signature
Mirror hanger, Felecia Day photoshopped with Elon Musk
(Young woman pulls into driveway, kisses Elon [signifying another safe journey], gets out. Cop rolls up behind her.)
Cop: Ma'am! I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to give you a ticket.
Woman: What for?
Cop: Not exceeding minimum noise requirements on the freeway.
Woman: I'm aware of a minimum _speed_, but minimum noise... (?)
Cop: Yes, we in the law enforcement field are very concerned that these "quiet cars" are running down old people, kids, [beat] wheelchair kids--willy-nilly, and we want it to stop.
Woman: I'm pretty sure there have been no documented cases of [interrupted]
Cop: Silence! My dream is for the government to require all "quiet cars" to have noise enhancers.
[Cut to scene of a Model S, Tesla Roadster, Nissan Leaf, and a Plug-in Prius pulling up to a four way stop. Each car has a grating sound, each more annoying than the last. Beep, Beep, Car Alarm, Foghorn, Slide whistle up and down. Guy on side of the road puts his hands to his ears. "Make it stop!". Falls down in a funny way.]
Back to main scene:
Cop: So this is one of them [with disdain] _electric_ vehicles? Don't you have to plug it in every 10 miles or so? [smug grin]
Woman: Actually, this particular model gets 265 miles or so to the charge, a bit more with these wheels [brief knowing look into camera - pan down to see non-existent aero wheels, mocks ups]. [inside joke]
Cop: [Annoyed] Really. Well, I heard on Fox News that these cars are going to overwhelm the electrical grid. Are you an eco-terrorist? [camera follows his hand slowly moving to taser on belt]
Woman: Actually, I charge at night, when electrical demand is lowest and power is cheapest.
Cop: [Annoyed] Well, you're still using the same dirty coal generated power that the rest of us are.
Woman: True, but it is easier to control emissions in one place rather than thousands of privately owned power sources.
[Pickup smoking horribly drives by, temporarily covering the policeman in smoke. Policeman coughs.]
Woman: And many EV owners actually have their own solar panels to supplement their power from the grid. As the grid gets greener, EVs look even better.
Cop: No storage, right? The batteries take up all the space? [very sure of himself]
[auto lift gate in rear]
Woman: Actually, this car has over 31 cubic feet of space.
Cop: So what ever possessed you to get this car now? [disappointed look]
Woman: Easy, it's the best car I've ever owned. Plus, 0 - 60 in 5.6 seconds. Top speed with this model is over 120. It's fun!
[Cop seen driving away. Camera pans back.]
Woman: [Opens "frunk". Throws ticket in. Turns around and starts walking back to the house. Calls to unseen person inside.] Honey, the shipment is here.
[Camera Pans Back and focuses on ticket on top. Front trunk is filled with clear bags with white powder.]
[Voiceover and Graphic] Tesla Model S: Great for hauling drugs.
[End]
Standard "The More You Know" Bumper